Why Most People Quit (And How to Push Through When You Want to Give Up)
3 strategies to survive the hardest phase of growth
You don’t suck, you’re in the “Gap”.
No, not the store with overpriced jeans. (Though, let’s be real—why are they never on sale?)
I’m talking about The Gap—the brutal, soul-testing space between where you are and where you want to be.
It’s where dreams go to test your patience.
Where ambition meets reality. And let me tell you—reality does not play fair.
I know this place too well.
I almost quit X-ray school because I thought everyone else in my cohort was better than me.
I had fully convinced myself I wasn’t cut out for it. So much so that I sat down with my clinical instructor, ready to tell her I was dropping out.
And then she told me I was the strongest student in the group.
I’m not bragging—I was shocked. I had been so convinced I was failing that I nearly walked away from something I was actually excelling at.
And that’s when I realized: we are our own worst critics.
We assume we should be better.
We think we should be further along.
We convince ourselves that if it’s hard, it must mean we’re not good enough.
But struggling doesn’t mean you suck. It just means you’re in The Gap.
The Flag on the Other Side
There’s a win waiting for you on the other side.
That little triangle-on-a-stick in my (obviously professional) drawing? That’s your trophy, your victory, your proof that you made it through.
But here’s the catch: you don’t get to claim it if you stop climbing.
So, how do you actually push through The Gap instead of letting it swallow you whole?
Here’s how.
1. Reframe Frustration as Proof of Growth
The biggest mistake people make is thinking frustration is failure.
It’s not. Frustration is a sign that you’re growing.
If it feels hard, good. That means you’re stretching beyond your current abilities.
Your brain is literally rewiring itself to level up.
Think of it like a video game. I will go with Mario Bros. cause I am old-school and can only play 2D games.
When you’re in a level and the brown mushroom Gumba bumps into you lose your life.
How boring would that game be if you just threw away the controller and never tried to go a bit further.
Next time you will see him coming an jump.
You get a little bit better every time and inch out of the gap.
A couple years ago I enrolled in flight school.
I felt like I was completely out of my element (and my mind) the first few flights.
I couldn’t grasp all the ways the plane could move. Unlike a car that just stays on a road, a plane goes up, down, left, right, tilts, and yaws. (remember, I am a 2D kind of person).
I hit The Gap hard. I told myself, "No way am I ever going to learn how to fly this thing."
But I kept showing up.
After 20 hours of instruction I was taking off, flying, and landing—with barely any help.
So the next time frustration starts screaming at you, don’t take it as a stop sign.
Take it as proof that you’re in the process of becoming better.
2. Set Micro-Wins to Keep Momentum
It’s easy to get overwhelmed by how far away the goal looks.
When something feels too big, the brain shuts down and defaults to “let’s see what’s going on on Tik Tok”.
This is when you need to forget the big end goal for now. Shrink the target.
Instead of “I need to write a book,” make it “I’ll write one paragraph today.”
Instead of “I need to get in shape,” make it “I’ll do 10 push-ups.”
Instead of “I need to be a millionaire,” make it “I’ll save an extra $5 today.”
Did one workout? Win.
Wrote one paragraph? Win.
Sketched for 10 minutes? Win.
Every small win stacks. And before you know it, you’ve built something real.
I still find myself feeling in the gap on many days and lately it’s tied to writing (I ditched the planes and picked up the pen a year ago).
But every note I post or article I write is moving me in the right direction.
Small steps might not feel like much in the moment, but they keep you moving.
And movement beats perfection every single time.
3. Detach from the Outcome & Trust the Process
Most people quit because they’re obsessed with immediate results.
As someone who talks fast, walks fast, and works fast…I can totally relate to this.
It’s common to start something and immediately start judging it:
"Is this working?"
"Is it good yet?"
"Why haven’t I gone viral?"
This is the wrong focus.
We must shift from results → reps.
The best athletes don’t stare at the scoreboard every second—they just keep playing the game.
The best artists don’t judge every brushstroke—they paint until the masterpiece emerges.
The best creators don’t obsess over metrics—they put in the work and let time do its thing.
You don’t need to know exactly when you’ll succeed. You just need to keep showing up.
Last year, I experimented with a YouTube channel using AI images and motivational voiceovers.
I committed to posting one video every single day for three months.
So, every Saturday, I locked in and batch-created content for hours.
For a few weeks it was nothing but crickets.
Then out of nowhere—a spike.
Views shot up. Subscribers followed. Before the three months were up, the channel was monetized.
The wild part is I wasn’t even expecting it.
I had simply committed to the reps and detached from the outcome.
When you detach from the outcome and trust the process, and put in the reps you are just one step away from getting out of that gap.
The Only Way to Fail Is to Stop
Let me make this simple.
The easiest way to guarantee failure is to quit.
The only way to guarantee success is to keep going.
It doesn’t matter how slow it feels. If you’re still moving, you’re still in the game.
The best dopamine hit isn’t a like, a comment, or a viral post.
It’s getting to the other side of The Gap.
Your future self is already standing there. Keep climbing.
Final Thoughts
If you’re in The Gap right now, good. That means you’re in the process of becoming.
Just don’t stop. You can hit ‘pause’, take a breather, but don’t quit.
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Well written. To the point. Clear-cut language. Love reading you Sirah. Keep going.
Your writing is amazing Sirah. Silly me thought that you were "born to fly" and never had trouble becoming a pilot. We often don't see other people's struggles, only their victories.
Also, crazy results with your YT channel. Makes me want to jump ship and try it too LOL